When people speak of domestic violence often times it is assumed they are talking about adults, but did you know teen dating violence is all around us? According to the Center for Disease Control (CDC) 1 in 11 females and 1 in 14 males experienced physical dating violence last year and 1 in 8 females and 1 in 26 males also experienced sexual dating violence. February is dedicated to being National Teen Dating Violence Awareness Month. (TDVAM) The theme for TDVAM for 2022 is Talk About It! This is to encourage our teens and those who love them to have meaningful conversations about characteristics of healthy relationships and to point out what may be unhealthy or abusive. Conversations with peers and loved ones are essential when it comes to feeling safe and supported.
Teen Dating Violence @teendvmonth.org reports 4,105 teens are victims of dating violence daily and 10% of U.S. teens have experienced dating violence. Teen dating violence has profound impact on lifelong health, opportunity, and well-being. Unhealthy relationships can start early and last a lifetime. The good news is by talking about it and bringing light to the issue, violence is preventable and we can all help our teens grow up violence-free.
Teens who find themselves in an unhealthy, abusive, or violent relationship may show signs of depression and/or anxiety; they may turn to drugs, tobacco, and alcohol, become anti-social, or consider suicide. By talking about the characteristics of healthy relationships and the red flags of dating violence with our teens we help them to build necessary skills to create and maintain healthy relationships.
One of the most important things to know when talking to teens about dating violence is the warning signs.
Unhealthy relationship situations that may raise a red flag include:
-Name calling/belittling
“You’re crazy!”
“You idiot, now you have made me angry!”
-Condescension
“No wonder you are always complaining about your weight, look how clean you made that plate.”
-Threats of violence to people, animals, or themselves
“I’ll kill myself if you breakup with me.”
-Telling their partner what to wear and who they can hang out with
“Don’t wear that, it makes you look cheap.”
“If you really love me you won’t hang out with them.”
-Wanting complete access to social media accounts, requesting passwords
“If you have nothing to hide then give me the passwords.”
-Demands constant attention with or away from their partner
(Calling, texting, or interrupting the time spent with others.)
-Statements of ownership
“If I can’t have you, no one can.”
-Isolates partner from friends and family
“I don’t know why you want to go spend time with them when it is my night off work with you.”
-Accuses their partner of cheating
“Is that your boyfriend messaging?”
“Took you long enough to get home, where did you go? Who did you have to see?”
-Gaslighting
“Why are you so sensitive to everything? I was just joking.”
These are just a few characteristics of an unhealthy relationship and teens should look for these warnings. Talking to teens can be tricky, but bringing the conversation up, even while in a healthy relationship, is necessary.
If you or anyone you know is a victim of domestic violence please call us at 1-888-554-2501, our Morrilton office at 501-354-1884, or our Perryville office at 501-889-2030.
References
“Preventing Teen Dating Violence |Violence Prevention|Injury Center|CDC”. Cdc.Gov, 2022, https://www.cdc.gov/violenceprevention/intimatepartnerviolence/teendatingviolence/fastfact.html.
“Talk About It”. Love Is Respect, 2022, https://www.loveisrespect.org/talk-about-it/.
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